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The release of tension from a former life continues, but like a rubber band stretched tightly around a bundle for too long, and it is brittle and filled with cracks and will not take its former shape back. You cannot stretch one like that anymore. It breaks in your fingers. I must find a new way of holding myself together. Maybe I won’t roll me up so tight this time but leave myself in stacks and piles, or I’ll just throw me in a box to shuffle through, or hang myself on the walls, or tile the floor with me and dance on it.
Whatever…toyful metaphor,
My visions these days are of creation and destruction, revealing the interplay of a world invisibly orchestrated by passionate deities known by many names, or defined by the pale banners flying on the flagpoles of scientific explanation. Visions like this come with the aging territory or a mind unseated by change.
“A rose by any other name” blooms and dies like everything else, in the dark beauty of the manifest world, so glorious to the senses, all-obedient to the slipping sand of the planet-driven time piece (mixed clock metaphor) that destroys all splendid creations, that in turn destroys the splendid creations, that in turn destroys…
All creation participates,
Like the barnacles living below
The masterpiece of an old wooden pier,
An anchored colony of crowded black shells
Rotting the pilings in their natural way of stubborn survival,
With a life of its own, unseeing
And sharing space with the graceful green sea grass
That waves in sea swells
That rush up the shore,
Chasing shrieking children
And over-running their castles of sand.
Daily footsteps on the sun-bleached planks above,
Night and day, night and day
Smooth the grain of willing wood
That bends with the pendulum of the moon tides,
And groans with creaking joints,
Creating summer joy for young lads growing,
And winter memories for old men musing.
In Reply to: Castles and Piers posted by Jim H. [801.1351] on August 09, 2006 at 05:44:07:
maybe you need some New tensions to rejuvinate your stretched out bands. Geritol might help freshen them up.))
In Reply to: Castles and Piers posted by Jim H. [801.1351] on August 09, 2006 at 05:44:07:
As usual Jim, you do put a new slant on things. Thank you.
In Reply to: Castles and Piers posted by Jim H. [801.1351] on August 09, 2006 at 05:44:07:
One of my regular correspondents busted me for coming from a melancholy place with the "pier" piece, Walt, and questioning my plans and suggesting solutions. She knows me well and is sensitive to moods. I had thought I was fairly unsentimental about my continuing efforts to chroniclize the aging journey, but maybe not, eh? I hadn't intended to bring the board down, and maybe it is a poor place for the images of demise I am trying to reconcile in myself. So many here are focusing on renewal.
Here was my answer to her.
* * * * * *
Melancholy it is, and I see it shows in the morose aging metaphors. Thanks for noticing.
The San Diego move will be tonic; however, and a place of nostalgia and renewal that may be just what I need. MIL's house here is what I have to escape, and the chaos that surrounds it and the new business. I'm a boring homeboy, and Sharon is a "mover and shaker". The only thing I move these days is my bowels (still, thankfully), and the only thing I shake is salt and pepper.
But you may be right about the pills, Trazadone (generic for Desyrel), might be helpful. I have taken short-term doses in the past (writer's temperament?). The last time I tried it, it gave me baggy eyes in the morning, so I stopped, but my vanity now takes a back seat to the joint pain that has suddenly come upon me three months ago...I mean suddenly! Like overnight! It has consumed me, this hip and lower back arthritic like pain. I have tried all sorts of alternative treatment (the three legged stool) to no avail, and I am "down" over it, a wimpy sort of down. I can more easily sympathize with your back pain, though mine is more a grinding down sort of constant, mostly low-grade, nagging, spirit-robbing pain; more than a debilitating one at this point. I suppose I'm feeling sorry for myself.
And, I have a "thing" for piers...what can I say...and all splendiferous creations of human effort that decline into the same romantic category as worn out sneakers and knee-torn jeans, and that mirrors the bittersweet and insistent tic-toc that will transform us all into the next generation's old fashioned photos...the "reaper", the well intentioned but officious housewife of renewal, Kali the cleaning lady. I just feel compelled to record these admittedly melancholy images, to honor them, because I can. It's something I can do.
Then I go eat a hotdog at a Padre's game, or take my nieces to one of their softball practices and give my best uplifting participation and Uncle Jim impersonations...and a Buddha smile.
Testing the mettle, eh? Yep, and there is a spirit about it, the growing old thing; the ascendancy of a "thee" spirit about relationship, and a redefinition of words of personal identification, like dignity and expectations, and a mellow sort of resignation with sentimentality held in check…and ideally, a Molly Brown spirit in there somewhere too.
In Reply to: Re: Castles and Piers, Walt posted by Jim H. [3131.1351] on August 11, 2006 at 07:54:48:
sounds like you need a dream or a plan, for your remaining days. You may be around for a Long time, and not loose much ability.
I try to avoid people who are miserable, and like to chat with young people, or older ones who still do things, or want to. My 92 yr old friend is looking forward to a new city garden from a friend who is giving his up, since the city took over the one he had for 20yrs. His wife just died, but he still is looking forward to going to spend the winter with his son in Tx. He usually drives the 1500mi, but his son said he would come up and drive down with him, now that he is alone. He is looking at a new, smaller SUV or pickup, because he doesn't need as much room, and gas is so high.
My social life is limited, because of my limitations, and many friends, young and old dying, but you pick up new ones along the way, even if years go by. A few yrs ago I made a new friend half my age, because we have similar interests. Yesterday I started chating with a guy in the diner, who I had spoken to once before, but not for that long. He is a few yrs older than me but was in the same branch of the service that I was, and has a lot of interests that I do, and similar knowldge. Since my injury, the diner was a place to hang out, and chat with many people. I would stay while many people came and left. As one friend would leave, another would replace them, so my butt used to get flat. New owners took over 10yrs ago, and the usual customers stoped coming for different reasons, and very few new ones were very talkative. I wondered if me being older a reason for people not being as sociable, but think it is just that the people aren't. I can always get a few words out of the waitreses while they work, but the new owners are more strict, and the diner became busier. I can't just sit, so always bring something to read, and listen to a radio with ear buds, and figure things that I Want to do on a napkin, or make lists, because my short term memory is bad, though not as bad as it used to be after my injury, where I couldn't remember things from one second to another, and to plan or work on something, I had to list Each step, like to Open the hood on the car, to work on the motor.
I am Trying to work on replacing mortar that came out from the bricks on the side of my house, and it is a real challenge. It is a row house and I have to get on top of the flat, concrete roof of my neighbors garage, which he broke away the front edge to open it up to make it a yard, replacing the door with a cinderblock wall, that doesn't reach the roof, so a tricky endeavor,having to get across the opening, hauling up all kinds of gear, and maybe even the ladder I get up there on, to get high enough on the wall. It doesn't take much to stop me from starting. The weather is one thing, since it has to be ideal, and I have to feel good, and neighbors will always have something dumb to say, like I make them tired just watching me, or why don't I get someone to do it, which will probably not do it like I want to, since I always go the extra mile, often because I let things go too long, because of my limits. I was hoping today would be the day. Weather is perfect, and fewer neighbors will be around, but if I'm not Up to it, I am leary because of the risks of the height, and the riging I have to do, and all the gear I Still have to find.
I have little problem when someone asks me to help them do something, but Really have a problem motivating myself now a days. I can Always find an excuse, which was Never my style, since I could Always find a reason to do something, or the desire and ability.
You may need a challenge, or something that moves you. Something that makes you think of how you will get it done, and not how old you are, or how you feel. When I have a pain or problem, I look for a cure or solution.
In Reply to: Re: Castles and Piers, Walt posted by Jim H. [3131.1351] on August 11, 2006 at 07:54:48:
Some unsolicited feedback from the peanut gallery:
Death is a part of life, it is there as a constant reminder that we shouldn't take things for granted, that we should appreciate what gives us pleasure. It is a goal post that we will all someday encounter. Personally, I feel it is healthy to contemplate it, at times.
As one ages they gather more wisdom and begin to put things into an even larger perspective, capturing the bigger, most realistic picture, which includes death. These wise old sages are deemed extremely valuable in many cultures -- imparting wisdom, shining a beam of light on the future, and helping people to accept their inevitable fate.
So, your place here as a keen observer of our collective human plight, brilliantly recording the good, the bad, and the ugly, is crucial, not to mention thought provoking and entertaining.
And on a final note, retiring, moving, trying to acclimate to new people, places, and activities is a big deal, a big adjustment. So cut yourself some slack, give your nieces a hug and a kiss, and be grateful that you have people who love and care about you.
In Reply to: Re: Castles and Piers, Walt posted by Vince F [4572.20] on August 11, 2006 at 09:10:42:
...for the thoughtful reply and yet another glimpse into the wonderous
world of Vince.
In Reply to: Re: Castles and Piers, Walt posted by soup to nuts [2065.890] on August 11, 2006 at 14:20:06:
...for your kind words and lofty compliments. The air is too rarefied
for me on a sage's mountaintop though. My words are mud pies on
the sidewalk made for the joy of getting my hands in the smoosh of
it. Like a kid, I like someone to admire them before they get washed
away.
In Reply to: Castles and Piers posted by Jim H. [801.1351] on August 09, 2006 at 05:44:07:
Always a joy to read your stuff Jim. I'm sure glad Walt and Bill archive it, because then when my computer crashes I can always get it back if I had saved it to read whenever I want. :-)
In Reply to: Thanks, peanut... posted by Jim H. [291.2562] on August 12, 2006 at 09:39:18:
You're quite welcome and I understand. Please continue to make castles out of mud, and we'll continue to marvel at your creations. But, at least we can all rub shoulders on the same sidewalk...
In Reply to: Castles and Piers posted by Jim H. [801.1351] on August 09, 2006 at 05:44:07:
Om srim desyrel namaha. Yowsa, oh Great Alpha father and mystic poet of desolate spiritual junkyards and inner wisdom galaxies alike. Kali (mixed breed) has seen your (p)light, and is moved to swing her necklace of mischeviously grinning skulls in your direction. Her advice to you is, savor a stiff shot or two, don your most outrageous Heyoka high-top sneakers, and dance bass ackwards in the face of creation and destruction alike. Let the uncreated purr forth from you as you dance in the lightening. --And don't forget to fart.
In Reply to: Re: Castles and Piers posted by Kali (mixed breed) [6689.2808] on August 13, 2006 at 04:02:44:
...irreverent goddess of dark and unpopular truth, and thanks for
dropping by, old friend of board days or yore.
Here is a prayer that showed up on my private world-wide-web of
anonymous, amateur writer types, a sort of mutual muse-sharing
chain of global email banterers.
Brilliant, greatly misunderstood by the average, and with great Truths
behind the skillful tongue-in-cheek...I post it with my sincere
apologies to the ecclesiastically narrow and the humorously
restricted reader.
* * * * * * * *
Prayer for You
I'm happy to announce that this is a perfect moment. It's a perfect
moment for many reasons, but especially because I have been
inspired to say a gigantic prayer for all of you. I've been roused to
unleash a divinely greedy, apocalyptically healing prayer for each and
every one of you -- even those of you who don't believe in the power
of prayer.
And so I am starting to pray right now to the God of Gods ... the God
beyond all Gods ... the Girlfriend of God ... the Teacher of God ... the
Goddess who invented God.
Dear Goddess, You who never kill but only change:
I pray that my exuberant, suave and accidental words will move you
to shower ferocious blessings down on everyone who reads this
benediction.
I pray that you will give them what they don't even know they want
-- not just the boons they think they need but everything they've
always been afraid to even imagine or ask for.
Dear Goddess, You wealthy anarchist burning heaven to the ground:
Many of the divine chameleons out there don't even know that their
souls will live forever. So please use your blinding magic to help them
see that they are all wildly creative geniuses too big for their own
personalities.
Guide them to realize that they are all completely different from what
they think they are and more exciting than they can possibly imagine.
Make it illegal, immoral, irrelevant, unpatriotic and totally tasteless
for them to be in love with anyone or anything that's no good for
them.
O Goddess, You who give us so much love and pain mixed together
that our morality is always on the verge of collapsing:
I beg you to cast a boisterous love spell that will nullify all the dumb
ideas, bad decisions and nasty conditioning that have ever cursed the
wise and sexy virtuosos out there.
Remove, banish, annihilate and laugh into oblivion any jinx that has
clung to them, no matter how long they've suffered from it, and even
if they've become accustomed or addicted to its ugly companionship.
And please conjure an aura of protection around them so that they
will receive an early warning if they are ever about to act in such a
way as to bring another hex or plague or voodoo into their lives in
the future.
Dear Goddess, sweet Goddess, You sly universal virus with no f***ing
opinion:
I pray that you will help all the personal growth addicts out there
become disciplined enough to go crazy in the name of creation, not
destruction.
I pray that you will teach them the difference between oppressive
self-control and liberating self-control, awaken in them the power to
do the half-right thing when it is impossible to do the totally right
thing.
Arouse the Wild Woman within them -- even if they're men.
And please give them bigger, better, more original sins and wilder,
wetter, more interesting problems.
Dear Goddess, You pregnant slut who scorns all mediocre longing:
I pray that you will inspire all the compassionate rascals communing
with this prayer to love their enemies just in case their friends turn
out to be jerks.
Provoke them to throw away or give away all the things they own that
encourage them to believe that they are better than anyone else.
Show them how much fun it is to brag about what they cannot do and
do not have.
Most of all, Goddess, brainwash them with your freedom so that they
never love their own pain more than anyone else's pain.
Dear Goddess, You psychedelic mushroom cloud at the center of all
our brains:
The curiously divine human beings reading this prayer deserve
everything they are yearning for and much, much more.
So please bless them with lucid dreams while they are wide awake
and solar-energy-operated sex toys that work even in the dark and
vacuum cleaners for their magic carpets and a knack for avoiding
other people's hells and their very own 900 number so that everyone
has to pay to talk to them and a secret admirer who is not a psychotic
stalker.
Dear Goddess, You fiercely tender, hauntingly reassuring,
orgiastically sacred feeling that is even now running through all of
our soft, warm animal bodies:
I pray that you provide everyone out there with a license to bend and
even break all rules, laws and traditions that keep them apart from
the things they love.
Show them how to purge the wishy-washy wishes that distract them
from their daring, dramatic, divine desires.
And teach them that they can have anything they want if they'll only
ask for it in an unselfish way.
And now dear God of Gods, God beyond all Gods, Girlfriend of God,
Teacher of God, Goddess who invented God, I bring this prayer to a
close, trusting that in these mysterious moments you have begun to
change everyone out there in the exact way they've needed to change
in order to express their soul's code.
Amen. Awomen. And glory halle-f***ing-lujah.
In Reply to: Re: Castles and Piers, Walt posted by Jim H. [3131.1351] on August 11, 2006 at 07:54:48:
It may be melancholy but it is real and I enjoy it just the same.
Just like I enjoy Jim Morrison.
In Reply to: Thanks to the... posted by Jim H. [2733.2562] on August 13, 2006 at 07:12:18:
Oooooh! Them high top sneaks been flying, veritably, backwards across the crunching skulls and burning sands. Most excellent, fiercely compassionate One! You see so clearly that the world toppling Siva Brothers (Larry, Curly, and Moe Siva) and and the Vishnu Construction Company (Stereotyped New Age Cliche and Frozen Religious Paradigm Vishnu) are One and the Same. Fly on winged heels backwards, Coyote, glorious Irreverent One, so that sweet Shame can be brought to the surface and acknowledged in all of it's glorious, uncreated, primordial beauty. You are f***ing awesome! Kali (mixed breed) is most pleased, and will retire for a rum and tonic now.
In Reply to: Re: Castles and Piers, Walt posted by Jim H. [3131.1351] on August 11, 2006 at 07:54:48:
Looking back, I see how devastating life events have been for me the
last two or three years. I wish I'd been able to handle it better. I just
couldn't keep things at bay with the "stool". It was too much for me.
I knew I was in danger of a major illness. The arthritic symptoms
began suddenly about three months ago.
The pain is very inconsistent, sometimes one hip, sometimes the
other, sometimes the back, sometimes both hips, sometimes
everything hurts, sometimes nothing hurts. The right hip began a
click with the first few steps some mornings, then disappears.
Sometimes it is the weight bearing that bothers, sometimes it is the
sitting. Sometimes it just flat goes away for awhile altogether.
Stretching seems to help. Can hip joints have "mice"?
I decided against the anti-depressant, but instead have started a
temporary dose of an NSAID to kill the depressing pain which made
sticking to the following regimen so difficult for me.
I have added weekly massage to the following:
A half an hour of lap swimming daily - closer to strenuous than
leisurely
WFD -(perfect at the moment) I'm on the elimination diet this week
and will begin to challenge this weekend, but not dairy, grain, or
night shades.
Retirement has given me the time to get more deeply into SR, and the
effect is not being instantly erased by the daily grind and concerns
I've had in the past.
Stretching every day.
Hoping I can at least halt, if not reverse this thing, Walt.
In Reply to: Re: Castles and Piers, Walt posted by Jim H. [2733.2562] on August 14, 2006 at 06:55:48:
Jim,
have you tried icing it when it's localized pain?
In Reply to: Re: Castles and Piers, Walt posted by lissa [2032.8] on August 13, 2006 at 08:20:19:
...Yikes!
But I think I know what you mean, Lissa.
The dark side of things (or one's "Self") is ignored at one's own peril,
but it is easy to become ensnared in it, or identify with it, which leads
to self-destruction (ala Morrison).
One can honor the whole and still remain upbeat, eh? I think so.
In Reply to: Jim Morrison?... posted by Jim H. [2733.2562] on August 14, 2006 at 13:34:06:
Yeah. Morrison's story is truly depressing.
I hope you are feeling better soon. I'd avoid the antidepressants too if it was just life getting me down, I think they serve a purpose, but I'm not sure they are the answer to every little depressed feeling people get. I don't let myself get depressed, but I'm not experiencing a lot of physical pain either.
In Reply to: Re: Castles and Piers, Walt posted by lissa [5452.8] on August 14, 2006 at 07:00:09:
...both seem to help, lissa, thanks...so does stretching.
In Reply to: Re: Castles and Piers, Walt posted by Jim H. [2733.2562] on August 14, 2006 at 06:55:48:
Yeah, Jim.
You have hit upon the only shortcoming of the 3LS: It takes a while to see symptomatic results. We have tried our best to document how long it takes for each leg to show noticeable results (archives and RYH), when done alone, and SR takes the longest: Certified effective SR takes 3-6 months for more than temporary benefits.
Of course, the ideal is to be "fixing the roof while the sun is shining" but most of us will not do that.
Patience and perseverence is my only suggestion at this point.
Namaste`
Walt
In Reply to: Re: Castles and Piers, Walt posted by Walt Stoll [93.1889] on August 15, 2006 at 06:30:05:
Thanks, Walt, and I really do know that. I guess you could say, when
it's raining, or more rightly, when you are squishing on wet carpeting
from a leaky roof, your focus is on wet and wrinkled feet rather than
the roof, and nailing new shingles doesn't dry the carpet right off.
To abuse another metaphor, I wasn't taping over the dash lights, I
just couldn't get the damned engine turned off!
I know I'm on the right track. I have overcome BP and digestive
difficulty in this way. It is weird that each descent into disease has
resulted in a completely different set of symptoms.
I won't be able to sluff off when I overcome this one either, because
the next challenge will not be coming from the stress of outer
circumstance, but from the natural decline of function due to aging.
A very good reason to be a very good boy!
I don't know how to thank you for saving my life.
Jim
In Reply to: Re: Castles and Piers, Walt posted by Jim H. [2733.2562] on August 14, 2006 at 06:55:48:
Hi Jim,
Learn how to stretch all of the muscles of the pelvis and hip. Your massage therapist may be able to teach you; otherwise find a personal trainer or better yet, someone who knows Active Isolated Stretching. (link below). You need to learn very specific stretches which directly target specific muscles to get the best results.
Are you seeing a chiropractor or physical therapist for this?
Are you sure they are arthritic symptoms? How do you know that?
Best wishes,
Jan
In Reply to: Re: Castles and Piers, Walt posted by Jim H. [2733.2562] on August 15, 2006 at 06:53:03:
Thanks, Jim.
Your wisdom and skills of expression have lightened MY days and those of many others!
Namaste`
Walt
In Reply to: Re: Castles and Piers, Walt posted by Happygal [2062.2803] on August 15, 2006 at 09:23:47:
I'm not sure it is arthritis. The doubt is that the pains move about
between the lower back and hip joints and sometimes disappear
altogether. Sometimes weight bearing bothers them not at all,
sometimes it's sore at rest, sometimes not. Sometimes the pain
seems to come as a reaction to stress and subside with relaxation,
weight bearing or not. It reminds me, in that way, of the time I had
"joint mice" in the knee, which micro-surgery resolved.
Stretching usually helps temporarily, and the pain responds to a
NSAID, which I hate taking for the relief and peace of mind.
I was working with a massage therapist on doing isolated stretching,
but the "activity" was all with her. She was twisting me every which
way on the table, focusing on those three areas. We hadn't been at it
very long when a long-time cyst (on chest) inflamed and had to be
excised. I had to miss a couple of weeks while it healed, and it was
shortly after that that this began. Then I moved to CA for the
summer.
I've fantasied that the newly stretched areas sort of "slammed shut"
because of being rather aggressively stretched for the first time since
forever, and then suddenly stopped. Maybe that's silly.
The new therapist is doing full body, deep tissue, and so far not the
isolated stretching, but I have been doing it on my own, using asanas
I learned years ago. I'll check out the link if you can make it show on
the post.
No chiro yet, or PT, but I will get to that when I get to SD next week.
I had a full panel blood test too, and the doc said she would notify me
in any values were abnormal, and didn't, so sed rate must be normal,
hence, no RA.
Thanks for the suggestions.
BTW, I did resolve the digestive issues we've discussed by using the
herbal program recommended by the Silver Fox and am glad not to
have to deal with that at the same time.
Hope your "issues" continue to improve.
Jim
In Reply to: Re: Castles and Piers, Walt posted by Jim H. [2733.2562] on August 16, 2006 at 07:46:44:
Jim,
You have made some big changes in your life and had a major loss. The fact that your pain comes and goes and is in different places, just smacks of TMJ. There are a couple of books by Dr. John Sarno that address your problem. Give them a look see.
Silver Fox!
In Reply to: Re: TMJ?? posted by Steve [3019.1399] on August 16, 2006 at 07:57:25:
Thanks, SF, but the pain is localized in lower back and hips...and as
always, thanks for your helpful and lighthearted presence on the
board.
In Reply to: Thanks to the... posted by Jim H. [2733.2562] on August 13, 2006 at 07:12:18:
...but the world can use spiritual inclusion these days, especially in
the "hot spots" we all know about, but also in our neighborhoods and
in our own hearts. Such horror has been fomented in the name of
religion throughout time!
So...
A prayer for the followers of all the religions of the world and for
those with no religion:
"Gracious Spirit, we offer these petitions for reconciliation of the
peoples of the world, acknowledging the wealth of religious diversity
and cultures in our global community. We pray also for our friends,
relatives, and those who claim no religion...
In the knowledge that aspects of any religion may be taken to
extremes, we pray for those whose human dignity has been
diminished because of someone else's understanding of religion...
We ask for forgiveness for our part in tarnishing the Divine Image.
Through these petitions, we hope for reconciliation in any
relationships that have become strained or shattered through the
misuse of a religious belief, practice, or tradition. Be with us now as
we celebrate the potential for Goodness that is unique in each faith.
We also lift up those who have no faith or religion and we respect
their integrity."
In Reply to: No, I'm not a pagan... posted by Jim H. [291.2562] on August 16, 2006 at 09:27:31:
Hey Jim:
I so enjoyed your prayer in its original language of ancient "In-Your-Face", that I feel it may have lost something in translation:-)
In Reply to: Re: TMJ?? posted by Jim H. [291.2562] on August 16, 2006 at 08:57:24:
How's that for being caring and lighthearted?
Silver Fox!
In Reply to: Re: So, get the book anyway.. posted by Steve [3019.1399] on August 16, 2006 at 12:31:08:
You just love being a smart-mouth don'tcha?
I will get the book. I know all that stress-tenseness stuff is related.
Thanks again.
In Reply to: Re: So, get the book anyway.. posted by Jim H. [4000.2562] on August 16, 2006 at 12:36:09:
I can't be wipping your butt and nose the rest of your life..
Mother's are always right you know :)
Silver Fox!
In Reply to: Re: Like my mother use to say... posted by Steve [3019.1399] on August 16, 2006 at 12:43:05:
I'll take over the nose. You can continue doing the other.
In Reply to: Re: Like my mother use to say... posted by Jim H. [4000.2562] on August 16, 2006 at 13:33:29:
I knew you were going to say that.
Silver Fox!
In Reply to: Re: Castles and Piers, Walt posted by Jim H. [2733.2562] on August 16, 2006 at 07:46:44:
Hi Jim,
Wish you were here. I always teach my clients the stretches for them to do instead of doing it for them.
Sounds to me you have some kind of alignment issues. Try chiropractic, too. Or PT, sometimes my clients have better luck with PTs than with chiros.
Good luck, keep us posted.
Best wishes,
Jan
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