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Hi, my name is Jim, and I'm a...
When does one cross the line between habit and addiction, Walt? I am
sipping a cup of really bad coffee in the wee hours as I ponder this
question, which I admit I pose as an introduction to this pathetic little
tale of how far one (I) can (have) fall (fallen).
Since retirement, I have broken off my love affair with the middle of
the night, but staying in a different motel each night has upset my
new regular sleeping habits, so here I am up in the great quiet once
again. We are on a vacation trip on the Central Coast region of
California, seascapes and wine country galore. Now I have fallen back
on another habit, coffee. After an initial caffeine rush and a flurry of
words, I have a paradoxical reaction to the brew. It puts me to sleep!
So that is why I am sipping this dreck in a paper cup.
It was an ordeal to get my coffee tonight. It was mostly the darkness
that made it an "ordeal", that and Sharon was asleep, and by the
"Sharon" part I mean I was trying to not bang things around and
make noise, hard for me sometimes even in broad daylight. The
motel didn't help much either, neither did the manufacturer of the
coffee maker and the supplies.
The coffee maker and all the packets were in the corner of the room
next to the patio, on a little end table sort of thing, knee high. Dark
remember. So I'm hunched over, fumbling around making more noise
than I mean to, and, by the way, I am blind at close quarters. So I go
get my reading glasses, and in a brilliant stroke, I flip the switch on
the patio light, and voila, I can dimly see what I'm doing, and the
additional light is not enough to bother Sharon.
I find four big packets, that's easy, I learned that at the last motel; two
decaf, one caffeinated. Cool. Then I find four different shaped little
packets that my fingers tell me have individual sugars and powdered
non-dairy creamer, with ingredients I don't want to know about. The
other four smaller, square ones must be the tea. So far, so good. OK,
now the coffee maker. I fumble around trying to get the lid up so I
can put in the filter, but it's no good, it won't come up. Then I detect
some sort of extra piece on the side. Ah, a lever, a little catch to
release the top I think. But no, that doesn't help. A little more
fumbling around, and I discover the "lever" is actually a side-pull
basket that holds the filter (on the left side no less!). So, OK, I get it
now. They think they can fool me in the dark with an out of the
ordinary design? No way. I am outsmarting them.
Now the filters. I comb through the packets; coffee, tea, sugar,
creamer...nothing else...wait, here's something, no, only napkins. I
bang into the carafe again and freeze. Sharon's breathing stops, then
continues. How can this not wake her? Where are the damned
filters?! Maybe I could fashion the napkins into a filter. I'd probably
get tissue particles in my coffee, and it would all fall apart when I
tried to clean up. No, I need real filters. So I take the packets into the
bathroom to examine them in the light to be sure what I've got. They
are all just what I thought they were.
How can I sit up with my sleeplessness without coffee? No filters!
What's the matter with these people? But I know the truth. It is not
the maids, or the people who hire them; fate has it in for me again,
another little annoying ambush to keep me from contentment. Now I
am sounding like the grandpa I am, a grousing old guy who thinks
the universe has it in for him. So I stand before the complimentary
coffee station again, shaking my head at the low table, wondering
that I have not banged my shins on it by now, and I notice writing on
the top of the coffee maker. I bend close and see it is numbered
directions. There is not enough light to read them, but I can almost
make out the little graphics that go with the words. I tilt the top
toward the patio light and lean closer. It might as well be cave
drawings. Total gibberish. Then as I twist it more toward the light, I
see it is printed sideways on the top, and when I rotate it a little I can
read the numbers, two rows, one through four on top and bottom.
OK, and now the pictures make sense. There is a drawing of the filter
basket, and in it is nestled some sort of little pillow, no, it looks like a
rosin bag. Wait...could it be? I rush back to the bathroom with the
coffee packet and tear it open. Yes! Inside there is another packet, a
filtered packet filled with coffee. I do not need a separate filter! They
didn't really expect a rube like me could figure this out, did they?
Relieved, I hurry back to the dwarf coffee station and wrestle open
the basket, throw in the packet and close the drawer. Now, let's see
how this thing works. Where is the "on" switch? Way in the back, of
course, and on the left side again. Who are these design people? Is it
plugged in? Push the switch...no light comes on. Shoot! Find the
cord and trace it down to its loose end. Not plugged in! No problem.
I understand. They don't want any electrical malfunction, so they
leave it unplugged...in the dark. So, on my hands and knees I grope
around under and behind the Lilliputian coffee stand for the outlet.
Nothing. I pull the little table out. Bare walls. Why would they put an
electrical appliance where there are no plugs?
Screw it, I gather up the cord and take the coffee maker into the
bathroom. I fill the carafe with bottled water that the hotel also
provides (they mean well). Then I put the carafe into place under the
basket and am about to push the "on" button, when some Good Fairy
whispers in my ear, "Put the water in the coffee maker, fool!" I've
done the other a few times, and once fried a perfectly good coffee
maker. Wouldn't that be just perfect after getting this far? Maybe
even start a fire.
After I poured my coffee, in my short-sighted way, I turned the coffee
maker off, and so now I am sipping on the barely lukewarm second
cup as I write this. But, hey, it's working. I'm starting to get drowsy,
so I'll go ahead and post this and get a couple more hours of shut-
eye.
Told you it was pathetic.
Pics of Central Coast
http://web.mac.com/jimhare/iWeb/picture/coast.html
In Reply to: Confession of a Caf-fiend posted by Jim H. [7520.3404] on May 01, 2007 at 04:38:24:
Jim, few people could make such a topic so engaging!
Good job - keep writing...
In Reply to: Confession of a Caf-fiend posted by Jim H. [7520.3404] on May 01, 2007 at 04:38:24:
What a predicament, Jim! You did well, considering you've had no training for motel coffee-making:)
I'm sure it's going to be an utterly gorgeous trip.
In Reply to: Confession of a Caf-fiend posted by Jim H. [7520.3404] on May 01, 2007 at 04:38:24:
Jim,
I will never understand why people drink coffee. I watch them make the craziest faces, because the coffee tastes so bad, but they keep drinking it anyway. Do they think it will get better, the more they drink it? How can they drink so much? Cup after cup. Where does it all go? I see beer drinkers do the same thing. Where does it all go?
My mother never let my brother, sister or I have coffee when we were young. We had to drink milk for strong teeth and bones. None of us drinks coffee even now. So tell me, what have I missed?
Silver Fox!
In Reply to: Re: Confession of a Caf-fiend posted by ukchris [1761.3374] on May 01, 2007 at 07:36:24:
Thanks, I appreciate the compliment, Chris.
In Reply to: Re: Confession of a Caf-fiend posted by Sally [8783.1590] on May 01, 2007 at 09:22:32:
Gorgeous, yes. And like the rest of Southern California, a heartache to
me that in a span of one lifetime it has gone from paradise to parking
lot...or at least well on its way.
In Reply to: Re: Coments from a non coffee drinker.. posted by Steve [3019.3308] on May 01, 2007 at 15:19:23:
I don't know, Steve, maybe a sense of irony?
In Reply to: Confession of a Caf-fiend posted by Jim H. [7520.3404] on May 01, 2007 at 04:38:24:
Jim:
Your only sin is falling victim to bad coffee, served in a paper cup, no less. Next time you get the urge, see if you can hold out just a little longer for the real thing. If you're going to enjoy coffee, make sure you only drink the best, the creme de la creme. Oh, and make sure the cream is also the "creme de la creme"; yeah, the real stuff.
In Reply to: Re: Coments from a non coffee drinker.. posted by Steve [3019.3308] on May 01, 2007 at 15:19:23:
Steve:
Nah, real coffee drinkers don't make "faces". What you saw was the look of ecstacy on their faces. And beer drinkers don't make faces either....well, maybe if their favorite team just lost. Then everybody makes a face.
Milk? Are you insane? Who drinks milk? That stuff is vile!!!!! I wouldn't give it to a dog on the street.
In Reply to: Re: Confession of a Caf-fiend posted by PhillyLady [5444.2761] on May 02, 2007 at 08:46:54:
Hi Philly, my best coffee came from using my little Black and Decker one-cup. And I love Kona coffee but now I use a drip type but can't find a good Kona. I don't care much for Starbucks and I think back to my first job where they had the most wonderful coffee that came out of a brown paper bag. So, what is your brew? The last time out I found Burger King serves a pretty good cup even though it's a paper cup.
In Reply to: Re: Confession of a Caf-fiend posted by Sally [8783.1590] on May 02, 2007 at 10:01:09:
Sally:
Anything that says Arabica Beans and Organic is what I used to buy. But coffee at home never tastes as good as coffee elsewhere, so I suspect the coffee-maker (Krups), or the other coffee-maker (me). The coffee isn't hot enough in my machine. Maybe that's what affects the taste.
I haven't had coffee in months since switching to green tea, but I'm willing to try again and resume the search for the perfect cup of java. There's nothing like the smell of freshly ground beans and just-brewed coffee.
Coffee isn't bad if you're a Blood Type A:-)
In Reply to: Confession of a Caf-fiend posted by Jim H. [7520.3404] on May 01, 2007 at 04:38:24:
Hi, Jim.
The definition of addiction is when there are physiolgical symptoms produced when one tries to stop whatever one is addicted to.
Hope this helps.
Walt
In Reply to: Re: Confession of a Caf-fiend posted by PhillyLady [5444.2761] on May 02, 2007 at 10:14:05:
Hi Philly. Have you tried a French press? I've been using them for about 20 years and my coffee tastes better than the stuff I get outside my house.
Naya
In Reply to: Confession of a Caf-fiend posted by Jim H. [7520.3404] on May 01, 2007 at 04:38:24:
I would've used the napkins......
In Reply to: Re: Confession of a Caf-fiend posted by Naya [120.14] on May 02, 2007 at 16:54:58:
Hi Naya:
No, I haven't tried a French press. Dare I ask how much a contraption like that would cost?:-)
In Reply to: Re: Confession of a Caf-fiend posted by Walt Stoll [93.1889] on May 02, 2007 at 14:35:49:
Given that definition, the sophistication of today's body monitoring
instruments, and our ego identification, Walt, one could arguably
assert that most of our behavior is addictive. Think of the physiology
of annoyance or pouting when you can't get your way. Imagine the
physiology of maintaining the habit of thinking we are right. We are
definitely addicted to our ego position.
But it was just a rhetorical question anyway, an opening to make fun
of myself. Nobody is a bigger fool than me. The lengths to which I
will go, in the pursuit of habitual behavior, produces physiological
symptoms too; first a blush, and then the endorphins of a big smile
when I see how ridiculous I am. It is a healthy thing to laugh at my
own foibles...to get at the head of the line to make fun of myself. I
think many chronic disease processes proceed from, or are enhanced
by, an overly serious self-assessment. You can see it right here on
the board.
In Reply to: Re: Coments from a non coffee drinker.. posted by PhillyLady [5444.2761] on May 02, 2007 at 08:54:09:
Mmmm...
I wonder how sales would be if they relabelled milk....
"Cow fluids"
In Reply to: Re: Coments from a non coffee drinker.. posted by ukchris [1400.3374] on May 03, 2007 at 09:42:14:
Chris:
Most people wouldn't want to see how their milk is made and certainly wouldn't want to see it on a label every time they took a sip.
Can you imagine reading the following on a milk label?: We cooked the good stuff out of the milk, as well as the bad stuff like pus, bacteria, and parasites. We left in the growth hormones and pesticides because we couldn't take them out. We added back some vitamins, but they had to be artifical (sorry, couldn't afford all natural).
In Reply to: carpe caffeine posted by Jim H. [3672.3404] on May 03, 2007 at 05:41:31:
Thanks, Jim.
Now that the anatomical center in the brain, that relates to ALL addictions, has been discovered I guess that many more things will be found to be actual addictions than we used to think.
Walt
In Reply to: Re: Confession of a Caf-fiend posted by PhillyLady [5066.2761] on May 02, 2007 at 20:02:56:
I see Naya hasn't responded, Philly. I have a small one. They are simply a glass pitcher with a plunger. You pour almost boiling water over the grounds and wait a few minutes. Then, you press the plunger slowly to the bottom of the pitcher while it captures all the grounds. I think they are very economical. I think the coffee is good but not very hot. I've never seen an electric one which would fix that problem I would imagine.
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