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Hi Dr. Stoll. First of all, glad to see that you are feeling well enough to do some messages on the board. I hope that you have continued improvement. My question is about stress and sr. I have been suffering from a cluster of symptoms that I now know are being caused by stress, been labelled "psychosomatic", "anxiety", "tension related", etc. I have no doubt now that stress is the cause. So, I have been doing SR for 4-1/2 months (has been certified). My question is this, I know what is causing my stress and I am not sure if changing it would be the right thing to do, if I continue with SR, will I stop reacting to this stress with the symptoms as I have been, or must I get rid of the stresser in order for the SR to really do its job.
In Reply to: for Dr. Stoll - stress and sr question posted by holly [338.10] on January 13, 2004 at 15:16:51:
I'm in a similar situation. My guess is that there will always be stressors in life. I mean if one's job is stressful, other jobs might be better but then family might be stresful. Then there is money probs. There are so many things that one can stress about. I'm stressing about this post. :)
I don't think that would be the answer personally.
In Reply to: for Dr. Stoll - stress and sr question posted by holly [338.10] on January 13, 2004 at 15:16:51:
Hi, holly -
If your stress is job-related, I can vouch for the fact that changing it will help you! It's harder to make a decision if the stress is relationship-related, of course, because there are so many things to consider.
In Reply to: for Dr. Stoll - stress and sr question posted by holly [338.10] on January 13, 2004 at 15:16:51:
Hi Holly. I can relate to what you are saying. I think it is impossible for us to rid our lives of all stress, we need to work on the way we react to it.
On the other hand, if it is something relatively easy to change, then why not do it. I just recently left a job that I felt was slowing my progress back to good health. I have been suffering from anxiety for the past several months. I had a job where I would work 13+ hour days, and it was really wearing me down. I have to say, it has only been about 2 weeks since I quit and already the tremors in my hands are gone. I am not going to be making as much money as I was, but I do not even care. Health and happiness are so much more important to me.
If it is a relationship that is stressing you, I suggest you evaluate the pros and cons of leaving it. You probably already know what you need to do, taking action is the hard part.
Good luck.
Lauren
In Reply to: for Dr. Stoll - stress and sr question posted by holly [338.10] on January 13, 2004 at 15:16:51:
Thanks, Holly.
Listen to Lauren, Marion and Steven.
Stopping overreacting to the stressors is the only thing you have control of (increasing the distance between where you live and the edge of your cliff). Having done the SR for this long should have reduced your overreacting sufficiently for you to be able to tell the difference. Within another 6 weeks you will have a pretty good idea if you still need to get rid of the stressor.
Understand that the longer you do the SR, the more reserves you will have to deal with the stressor.
Let us know how you do.
Walt
In Reply to: Re: for Dr. Stoll - stress and sr question posted by Lauren [6.15] on January 13, 2004 at 18:57:46:
Thanks for sharing. I'm glad that your job change has been such a positive influence on your health already. My stressor is a relationship, so making a change is not as easy. But, like you said, I already know what I need to do, it is just doing it that is hard.
In Reply to: Re: for Dr. Stoll - stress and sr question posted by Steven [280.62] on January 13, 2004 at 15:44:28:
"I don't think that would be the answer" - what would be the answer? Not sure what you are talking about.
In Reply to: Re: for Dr. Stoll - stress and sr question posted by holly [338.10] on January 14, 2004 at 10:40:05:
What I was getting at is trying to remove "stressors" is counter-productive because there will always be things that stress. Let me put it this way, the things we all worry about gets thrown on the backburner when more urgent things come up. Like people in other countries going through war don't worry about the things we worry about here. If your job is stessing you and you remove that, chances are that something else will stress you. You can't remove ALL stress.
I think removing the way your body deals with the stress is the key. The stress will always be there but finding out how you can stop your body from reacting the way it does is key. For some, relaxation works. For others, they try hynosis. Others do yoga. Me personally, I'm working on doing relaxation with the hope I can accomplish what I'm suggesting and eliminate my symptoms.
In Reply to: Re: for Dr. Stoll - stress and sr question posted by Steven [280.62] on January 14, 2004 at 12:48:21:
I believe I read that your main stressor is a relationship. If everything else is not stressful except the relationship (I don't know the details of what is stressing you in it), then the answer for that is obvious. But most relationships are stressful when you care for the person. Now, if the person is cheating or treating the other like crap, then that is entirely something else.
Hope this all helps.
In Reply to: Re: for Dr. Stoll - stress and sr question posted by holly [338.10] on January 14, 2004 at 10:38:40:
Definitely a person needs to change how they react to stressors in their lives if how they react is problematic. However, you do have some control over circumstances in your life. You might consider whether counseling is an option for you to improve your relationship. Just a thought.
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